Table of Contents
Suicide is the second leading cause of death among youth 10 to 24, with suicide rates increasing by nearly 50% over the past two decades [1].
Teens are aware of suicide, and many are discussing it online, recently using terms like “unalive” to describe the words “suicide” or “kill” to avoid social media restrictions and have open discussions online. However, these words created within a digital platform to evade search term rules are now moving from online spaces into real ones.
Emily Litman, a middle school English teacher, reports hearing the term “unalive” regularly in her classroom of 8th graders. On one hand, using the term “unalive” can be a helpful way for teens to discuss serious issues online without automatic content removal. On the other, some fear this casual use of the word could downplay the severity of suicide in teens.
Regardless, it’s important for parents to be aware of what “unalive” means, how youth are using it, and how to discuss the important topic of suicide with your teen.
What Does The Term “Unalive” Mean Online?
“Unalive” is a euphemism for death or suicide that helps bypass social media algorithms such as TikTok or Instagram, which censor search terms or hashtags like “kill” or “suicide,” allowing teens to discuss these topics more freely online [2].
Examples of “Unalive” Term Use
Below are a few examples of how the term “unalive” is used among youth, pulled from social media platforms X (formerly Twitter) and Bluesky.
- “I forgot to remove the meat from the freezer lol. My mom is going to unalive me.”
- “The internet is going crazy. Did someone important get unalived?”
- In a more serious context, one user posted in April 2023: “My depression makes me want to unalive like I just start making a plan immediately so it’s actually funny when other people with depression think that I don’t have it because they see me actively fight against completed dying”.
- “Completed dying” is another term to describe suicide, like “unalive,” but less commonly used.
Is The Term “Unalive” Harmful or Helpful?
While some adults might see this as too casual or naive, others argue it allows youth a safe way to discuss and understand serious topics.
There is no agreed-upon professional consensus among mental health professionals and suicide specialists on whether the term is harmful or helpful yet. Some experts see the value of having a wider variety of language to spark serious conversations among youth, especially in the digital world, while others feel it downplays the severity of suicide and murder by erasing their original words and meaning.
One therapist who reports using the term “unalive” on her own social media account after hearing her patients use it states: “I think when we avoid using specific language to talk about suicide and sexual assault, we risk contributing to a culture of silence and shame surrounding these topics, but in the case of social media, it’s the avoidance of using the actual, uncensored word that allows awareness and conversations to even be possible.” [3]
“Unalive” allows users to discuss difficult topics without triggering automatic content removal, facilitating community building where individuals struggling with suicidal thoughts can connect and share resources.
How to Speak To Your Teen About Suicide
As a parent, it’s normal to find it difficult to start conversations around taboo topics like suicide with your teen. However, it’s better to have an awkward or uncomfortable conversation than not to say anything at all and risk a crisis.
Teens may not have the language or confidence to bring these kinds of topics up, so prep yourself before having this conversation to make it as efficient and effective as possible.
A few ways to speak with your teen about the topic of suicide include:
- Before having the conversation, make sure your teen is in a good headspace
- Plan to have the conversation in-person and in a private setting
- Manage your own thoughts, fears, and emotions, and speak with your teen about the topic calmly and clearly, not fear-based or using shameful or stigmatizing language
- Use honest, clear language about suicide while being sensitive to their age and emotional maturity.
- Ask open-ended questions and encourage them to share their feelings or what they already know about the topic:
- “How have you been feeling lately?”
- “What do you think about when you hear the word suicide?”
- “Have you seen the term unalive online, and what does it mean to you?”
- Respect their comfort levels and pace. Some teens are not ready to talk about the topic and may need time to open up or revisit it at a different time.
- Remind them that support and help are always available, even if they don’t feel comfortable speaking with you, encourage them to have a trusted adult that they feel comfortable speaking to during times of distress.
Helpful Insights for Parents at Clearfork Academy
Clearfork Academy is a network of behavioral health facilities in Texas committed to helping teens recover from substance abuse and mental health disorders, including supporting teens struggling with thoughts of suicide or who have made previous suicide attempts.
We offer medical interventions for addiction, mental health therapies, and medication services, as well as education and workshops tailored to parents of teens.
Our team understands the importance of addressing online search terms and social media trends, which play a significant role in the lives of today’s youth. Contact our team at Clearfork Academy today to find the support your teen deserves.
Sources
[1] CDC: National Center for Health Statistics. 2021. Suicide.
[2] Merriam Webster. Unalive.
[3] McMillan, J. 2023. Online, ‘unalive’ means death or suicide. Experts say it might help kids discuss those things. AP News.
Austin Davis, LPC-S
Founder & CEO
Originally from the Saginaw, Eagle Mountain area, Austin Davis earned a Bachelor of Science in Pastoral Ministry from Lee University in Cleveland, TN and a Master of Arts in Counseling from The Church of God Theological Seminary. He then went on to become a Licensed Professional Counselor-Supervisor in the State of Texas. Austin’s professional history includes both local church ministry and clinical counseling. At a young age, he began serving youth at the local church in various capacities which led to clinical training and education. Austin gained a vast knowledge of mental health disorders while working in state and public mental health hospitals. This is where he was exposed to almost every type of diagnosis and carries this experience into the daily treatment.
Austin’s longtime passion is Clearfork Academy, a christ-centered residential facility focused on mental health and substance abuse. He finds joy and fulfillment working with “difficult” clients that challenge his heart and clinical skill set. It is his hope and desire that each resident that passes through Clearfork Academy will be one step closer to their created design. Austin’s greatest pleasures in life are being a husband to his wife, and a father to his growing children. He serves at his local church by playing guitar, speaking and helping with tech arts. Austin also enjoys being physically active, reading, woodworking, and music.
